Sasha sucked in her top lip. "I take it you know what an SI is now?" Brian nodded. "I was scared Brian. I panicked." She closed her eyes. '1 step forward, 2 steps back.' She thought as she prepared to lie to Brian yet again. "What I said, about being an SI is partially true. I went through a period of time where I did injure myself on purpose. I don't do it anymore though." She hoped Brian wouldn't ask too many questions. 'I didn't completely lie to him. I am going to try not to SI again.'

Brian stared at Sasha. 'What happened to you Sasha?' He wondered silently. He unfolded his legs, stood up and then crouched down in front of her. He picked up her hands and held them in his. "Why were you scared Sasha? You know I would NEVER do anything to hurt you." He gave her hands a squeeze. "You didn't have to lie to me if you didn't want to be with me. I would have taken no for an answer."

The look on Brian's face crushed Sasha. "I'm sorry Brian." She started to cry again. "Please believe me when I say I do want to be with you. Even admitting I want to be with you scares me. It means letting you see a part of me I don't let people see. I don't just mean physically, Brian." She closed her eyes. "I have so many scars. I was afraid if you saw them, you would think I'm freak."

"Sasha," Brian brushed away a tear with his thumb. "I don't even know where to begin Sawsh." Questions flooded his mind. 'Do I ask her if she was abused? Do I want to know if she was raped? How will I handle knowing someone intentionally hurt her?' He stroked her cheek. "There are a lot of questions I want to ask you Sasha."

"Please don't Brian." Sasha requested. "Not right now." She bit her lip. "I know I owe you an explanation…"

"You don't owe me anything Sasha."

"Yes, I do." She whispered. "But I'm not ready to talk about it yet." She looked at his eyes. They were crystal blue. She could see the care and concern in them. He looked ready to cry as well. She knew she could trust Brian; she just wasn't ready to let him know the reasons behind her SI.